Some have argued that fresh waters are not relevant to the global carbon cycle and that soil is more important than rivers and lakes. Many aquatic scientists beg to differ. Looking at pools, fluxes, and global surface area, the deck appears to be stacked against fresh waters. But fresh waters are wildcards with hotspots, diversity, and connectivity. Could fresh waters trump soils? The best way to settle this is a live debate, with audience participation. Bring your full deck of ideas, jokers included. Everyone welcome.